Unpacking Emotional Luggage
Ways to Stop Avoiding Your Emotions and Actually Sort Through Them
I needed to waste some time as I was waiting to meet up with someone, so I thought I would enjoy browsing the TJ Maxx on Baseline and Stapley. While I was there, I saw all of these luggage bags, just remembering how much I love to avoid unpacking whenever I get home. I have just spent all of that time packing it away, I am exhausted, I just want to breathe.
We often compare the process of therapy to unpacking all of our baggage. In life, we carry around thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and experiences with us. This is like all of the stuff we pack into our suitcases. If we never let it out, sort through it, or put it away, then our emotional suitcase explodes.
Now, we might know we need to let it out, that keeping our feelings in isn’t good for us, but we still avoid it. Like unpacking luggage, we just want to rest, not think about more to get done, leave it for another day. But another day soon becomes many days, and we continue to collect more baggage.
How do we gain the motivation to unpack our metaphorical luggage?
We can stop and notice our suitcase. When we don’t unpack, it gets heavy, and it might even be ripping at the seams. We slow our pace, wishing we didn’t have to continue.
When we think of our feelings, this might look like noticing our physical health, our ability to carry on with daily tasks, getting overly emotional about something that doesn’t necessarily warrant it, or noticing you have no energy and maybe wish you didn’t have wake up. When we see how rough we are doing, we might see the necessity there is to unpack.
Making it a habit might also be helpful. Some people choose to be in therapy, just to encourage themselves to unload, to practice not keeping it all in. They just make it a routine and build it into their lives. Habits are easier to create when they are fun or when they are done with someone you like being around. In that way, choosing a therapist you connect with can help motivate you to keep going. Or even just pairing going to therapy with a coffee run can help you associate going to therapy with something you already enjoy, making creating the habit easier.
Being held accountable is supportive as well. That could look like using an app on your phone that reminds you to journal. Or even just telling others that you intend to work on yourself can help you feel obligated to follow through with it. Marking it on a calendar or a to-do list can have it feel more official. In general, you want to put it outside of your head, so that way you are encouraged to not let yourself or others down by failing to follow through.
Unpack! Stop reading about it, and seriously, just do it. If you are reading this, chances are that you know you need to get let loose a bunch of feelings inside so that you can live your life feeling lighter. Grab the motivation while you have it!
