The Myth of What Self-Help Looks Like

I want to share a silly story by comedian, George Carlin, because it touches on an attitude that a lot of my clients carry before they begin therapy: "I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose." Many people feel that they need to be the one driving themselves forward, that it is their burden and responsibility to help themselves. Well, like the comic bit I just shared, sometimes you don’t need to be the one figuring everything out alone. I think there’s this mistaken thought about therapy that the therapist is the one driving one’s healing journey. That isn’t true. You are always the one putting forth the efforts, venturing into the dark corners of your mind, setting the goals for where you want to be at the end of the therapeutic process. So, if you find yourself stuck with the self-help mindset, that you need to be the one embarking on your goals, remind yourself that no amount of assistance in getting there takes that initiative out of your hands. In fact, by reaching out for support, you are holding yourself accountable and setting yourself up for success.

"I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose."

~ George Carlin